Old Insecurities Run Deep

When I was in Bundy over the weekend I got a bit of a shock.  I saw, out of the corner of my eye, a girl I went to high school with.  After some sneaky reconnaissance I established that it was definitely her and a funny thing happened.  My confidence levels and happy drunken high dropped and I felt nauseas in my tummy.

Isn’t it funny how you can not see someone for years and they still make you feel the same way that they did 9 years ago?  We were quite good friends, but for the four years at high school she was constantly putting me down in a non-obvious way. And the most I ever did to stand up for myself was not accept her friend request on Facebook last year.

Obvious put-downs I can handle. I’m prepared for them and can let them slide of my back.  It’s one disguised as favours or compliments that I have never been able to deal with.  Perhaps because my Mother is such an expert at these. Anyway this girl used to do allot of “let’s give you a make over so a boy may actually be interested in you” etc etc, which quite frankly made me want to crawl into the cupboard under the stairs and cry.  Because I knew perfectly well that I wasn’t very attractive at the age of 15 (I didn’t get boobs or hips until about 20), and I was a bit strange back then as well.  And people drawing attention to this bothered me.

It bothered me as much as people saying “You’re so funny Ginger”.  People have been saying this to me for as long as I can remember and every time, even when its from people whom I genuinely love and I know genuinely love me, it’s like a little punch in the gut.  Because I feel deep down that they mean ‘Funny Peculiar’ not ‘Funny Ha Ha’. 

I wish I could say I was brave and went and spoke to High School Girl on Saturday night, but I didn’t. I just couldn’t face it. Especially the “What are you up to now” conversation that is obligatory.  So I avoided her, and soothed my distress with Vodka and dancing to Sexy Guitarist.

POST / DAY 15 of 365

Bundy Night Out

Bundaberg. Rum Capital of Australia and home of… well not much else.

I am so glad that I don’t live in a country town like that.  I’m quite sure that I would go insane.  I mean, it was a Sunday and the main street was DEAD. Absolutely dead. And the heat, well it gave me an indication of what the poor turkey must feel like roasting at Christmas time.

One thing it does have though is some brilliant pubs and men galore.  If there is one thing I love more than anything, is a night out in a busy pub with some awesome music, dancing the night away. Which Smash and I did with great enthusiasm.

Our final destination for the evening was the Central Hotel, which had a massive beer garden and a very talented guitarist performing. Not only was he talented but so extremely attractive that every time he looked at me I thought I was going to orgasm. Every women on that dance floor was ignoring the (also extremely attractive) other men that were vying for attention.. all eyes were on this guitar player. Big muscly arms with tattoos, hair up in a beanie, twinkly eyes a cheeky smile.. the only thing that would have made him sexier would have been a Scottish accent.

There is just something about a man who is musical.  In fact, a man who has any sort of skill, cooking, building, singing, comediennes, any sort of musical ability, turns me on. 

All in all, would go back to Bundy purely to see that guitarist play.. but that is probably the only draw card. 

It’s nice to be home.

Bundy Here I come

My frustration levels have been very high this week, and am looking forward to some fun in the Rum Capital of Australia this weekend. And an awesome 3 hour drive.

The road trip is one of those classic events that is always fun no matter what. There’s are a sugar from petrol stations and cheesy music high that just can’t be beaten.  So I’ve got my bags packed and I’m ready to go, they’re sitting here right by the door…

Am hoping that there is a strange untapped resource of men in Bundaberg for Smash and I to play with..

I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow!

To Go Out, Or To Stay In?

It’s Friday night and I have just got in from a looonnnggg day at work.  I should really go and do something fun.  After all, I’m a reasonably attractive single girl in her prime and I should go out and enjoy the world.

I weighed up the pros and cons of going out versus staying in and came to these conclusions:

• If I stay in I don’t have to pluck my eyebrows, shave my legs or do my bikini line. I can stay hairy and nobody will care
• I don’t have to do my hair or makeup
• I don’t have to change the contents of my handbag from everyday bag to going out bag
• Instead of putting on heels that will inevitably make my feet hurt (but that I would still wear because they are hot and pretty) I can lay naked on my comfy bed
• Whilst laying on my comfy bed I can watch rubbish movies that I like, and probably enjoy them more than I would conversation with people that I only mildly like

So here I am in bed typing my daily blog entry (which I apologise for not being very interesting) before I watch my rubbish movies. Sometimes its good to stay in.

2012 & All It’s Impending Doom

Yesterday I went and saw 2012.  I have always been a massive fan of the disaster movie epic. Armageddon, Deep Impact, Independence Day.. Love the romance, the father/daughter thing, the saving the world. 

2012 did not disappoint me. Yes it was a bit ridiculous but it was highly enjoyable, John Cusack was delicious as the stereotypical anti-hero.  The special effects were great and there was enough deaths, suspense and goodbyes to keep me in tears for the majority of the film.

The whole premise of the film was that the ending of the Mayan Calendar in December 2012 signals the end of days, the apocalypse, the rapture.  Slightly ridiculous really, but is it? 

Curious, I got on Wikipedia to read up on the 2012 phenomenon.  December 21st 2012 is said to be the end of a 5,125 year old Mayan Calendar.  I continued reading and got very confused by all the big words.  There is something about a planet alignment, global shifts in consciousness, geomagnetic reversal, black hole alignment etc etc.

Interestingly it is also the year that analogue television will switch off in many countries, the year of the London Olympics (therefore a leap year), the year that a massive near earth size object will pass earth, there’ll be a couple of solar eclipses, the 60th jubilee of Queen Elizabeth II,  the year that the US will cease military control of the Republic of Korea and I will turn 29. 

After reading a number of websites I came to the conclusion that whilst there is lots of theories, nobody seems to have any proof of anything and that it may just be a bit of Y2K fad. 

So if the world really is going to end, just as the Mayan’s may or may not have said, I won’t be one of the millions of people scrambling for higher ground or trying to outrun a giant super-volcano/tsunami/massive hole in the earth’s crust like in the movie.   What would be the point?  I’d much rather say a prayer, open a bottle of wine, and spend my last few hours on earth with a beautiful looking naked man.  And on the plus side.. I won’t have to deal with the whole turning 30 thing. 

God Bless As All. 

PS.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

I just remembered I would love to send a BIG BIG Happy 26th Birthday to Hawkeye, who is quite possibly one of the best friends a girl could ask for. Miss you and am teleporting myself back to the UK for a night out at the pub! (Well not really.. but am in spirit)

Blugh…

Today has been a long and tiring day.. work at 6.30, then went and saw 2012, then work again at 2.30.  I’m not feeling at all inspired so instead will tell you a funny story about what happened to me yesterday.

I was cleaning up in our office and put a tray thing full of display folders on top of the cupboard. All display folders come tumbling down onto my upturned face, one gets me in the eye, and cuts my eyelid.  Was excruciatingly painful and I don’t even have a black eye to show for it. Today one of my colleagues ran over my toe with a trolley. 

Tomorrow I shall have a brilliant review of 2012 for you, but as of this moment, I am getting into bed with “Romancing Mr Bridgerton” (Julia Quinn is the BEST trashy romance novelist around) and a glass of wine.

A Women Only Holiday? No Thanks, I’m Busy Washing My Hair

Those of who you who have known me for awhile will know that I am not one for feminism.  I am a bit old fashioned like that, probably because of the way I was brought up.

When I was waiting for my perpetually late friend on the weekend I was reading the newspaper, and came across an article about a big fuss being made because a lady was trying to start a company for “women only holidays” and the government found them discriminatory.

My first thought was why on earth would any woman want to go on a woman only holiday?? That is my idea of a nightmare, just as I despise a “Girls Nights Out”.  When I go on holiday I want to look pretty, and hopefully have a holiday fling, or at least flirt shamelessly with other people on my tour/in my hotel/my waiter/bartender etc.  I want to lounge by the pool/on the beach and look at attractive men.  Or sit in a delicious cafe/bar if it is a cold location, and look at attractive men. 

But that is not really the issue today.  The issue is women getting on their high horse again. The article then went on to say how horrible “Gentleman’s Clubs” are with their exclusivity and they are degrading to women.  I object.  The men in these clubs most likely have a high appreciation for the female form, and are not just exclusive against women, they also don’t let in bogans or poor people, so get over it.  I think they are a grand old tradition, and I’d rather we keep our old traditions alive and be a bit sexist than let them die out. Many a grand idea was thought of in a dark leather and smoke filled room over a brandy.

Feminism has just, for me, gone that one little step too far.  There are some jobs that women cannot physically do (unless you are a butch lesbian like country girl).  There are some jobs that men’s minds are more suited to.  And quite frankly, a woman was created to be a companion for the male species and procreate.

Just think about when divorce rates started really picking up.. oh yeah, when more and more women left their place in the home and started being career oriented.  I’m not saying “stay at home”, by all means go out and be a CEO.  But I have gone off topic and that is a story for another day, we were talking about all-women holidays.

This is how I imagine it: An endless stream of “What are you wearing?” “My ex-husband bla bla bla” “Ooh I love your outfit (subtext.. LOL, you look like a hippopotamus and I look fabulous! Woohoo!) “Your eating that? Do you know how many calories are in that baked potato smothered in sour cream?”. I like the company of my close female friends, but usually one at a time, or at the most a group of 3. Any more than that and I start craving the company of a penis. 

“Feminists? Equal pay is fine, but would it kill you to put on some lipstick?” Kitty Foreman – That 70’s Show.

All By Myself (Not That I Mind)

As a somewhat only child and being perpetual singleton in a world of couples I have gotten extremely used to my own company. 

I travel alone, spent much of high school and uni hanging out with myself and I don’t have a particular issue with taking myself out for a nice meal.

This is why I don’t understand the vast majority of my friends who can’t even go to the movies on their own.  When I saw New Moon last Saturday, I said to my companion that it was the first time in such a long time that I could remember going to the movies with someone.

If I had waited for someone to do things with, then quite frankly, I would never have done anything.

My BFF and I always planned lots of holidays together, but never went, so in the end I went on my own (She went with her boyfriend/now husband).  I desperately wanted to go to Turkey with The Ex but he chose to go with another girl so I went on my own. I probably had a better time than if I had gone with him.

I’ll admit travelling by yourself is scary.  Moving to the other side of the world when you know less than 5 people, it’s scary! And perhaps not for everybody.  But spending quality time with yourself is important. Whilst I do enjoy company, sometimes even crave it, after days on end spent in the company of others I am longing for some alone time. I think perhaps I’ll always be that way.

So harden up dear readers and go see a movie on your own.  You’ll probably enjoy it more when you don’t have someone fidgeting beside you.

New Moon vs The Vatican. New Moon Wins.

Yesterday I waited in line, clutching my tickets to see the latest instalment in the Twilight Saga “New Moon”.

I am a big fan of the books and found the movie highly enjoyable, very silly, and the audience comprised of 15 year old girls made me giggle with glee every time one of them whoop whooped at Jacob Black’s bare, buff and quite frankly delicious chest.

What I find interesting is the public reaction to the Twilight phenomenon. It reminds me of Pottermania of about 5 years ago, and it seems it is provoking the same amount of furore from the Vatican. 

Pope Benedict the whatever number he is publicly denounced the “subtle seductions” in Harry Potter, going on about how it promotes Un-Christian values towards Children (this is despite JK Rowling being a Christian herself and the whole 7 books being about the battle between good and evil, friendship and love).

Today it is Twilight that is angering the Holy people at the Vatican. Monsignor Franco Perazzolo has claimed that Twilight is a “deviant moral vacuum.. a mixture of excesses aimed at young people and gives a heavy esoteric element”. 

The first thing I did after reading this was of course look up the word esoteric (adj. Intended for or understood by only a particular group: an esoteric cult). The second thing I did was wonder why people take things so seriously.  I am the first person to admit I got carried away by the Harry Potter universe and have devoured the Twilight series with a hunger that surprised even myself. 

I think that perhaps the Vatican is a bit jealous, and without reason.  I mean, the bible is still the best selling book of all time and has more die-hard fans than all the Potter-heads and Twi-hards put together. So why complain? Are they worried that Rowling and Meyers are cutting into their book sales?  Jealous that whilst both series have hugely successful movie franchises, all they have is “The Passion of the Christ” and a few old Charlton Heston movies from the 50s? 

The quote that I liked best in this article (Saturdays Courier Mail) is that they think that the, and I quote, “the sex appeal of Robert Pattinson will have wider ramifications among Gnereation Y”.  I would like to know what these wider ramifications are? Pale will become cool? Men will become deliciously scruffy? All sounds pretty good to me! 

Twilight is not evil. It is not a cult. It is 4 books and 2 movies (so far) about a delicious love story, that has a legion of dedicated followers. Vampires and Werewolves are, I think, secondary to the romance.

And, in closing, as a Team Edward fan.. seriously Bella, quit being such a whore!  Getting poor Jacob all worked up then saying, sorry don’t need you anymore? Such a prick tease.

Miss Ginger: Super-Organised!

Oh the weather outside is frightful (it’s freaking HOT and STICKY)
But the Air-Con’s so delightful (BLESS Climate Control)
And since it’s too hot to go outside
Time to shop, Time to shop, Time to shop!

With only 37 Days left until Christmas, I am pleased to brag to you all the I have be super organised this year and completed all Christmas Shopping!

The only thing left to purchase is my Mother’s stupid bird feeder, which is too big to hide at the house, so need to find a hiding place first.

DAD – Tick; NEPHEWS x 2 – Tick; GODSON – Tick; BROTHER & SISTER-IN-LAW – Tick; ALL MY CLOSEST FRIENDS & THEIR OFFSPRING – Tick!

I’ve even managed to write all my International Christmas Cards, put stamps on them and have them sitting in a pile ready to post (but still need two addresses). 

Usually I have everything done by about the first week in December.. but this year I am on FIRE!  Mainly because I am broke and I have been buying gifts one pay at a time. Also because I have realised how much Sunshine Plaza (our local shopping centre for those who aren’t local) annoys me. You can never find a park, and it’s always full of teenagers, fat people and lesbians.

So I thought, “Clever Miss Ginger for getting everything done early” UNTIL I remembered that I will have to battle in the parking lot anyway as I work at the Plaza AND have volunteered to do Lifeline Christmas Wrapping this year. 

So really resistance of retail centres at Christmas is futile.

DAY/POST 6 of 365

You Don’t Like Me? Hmm.. I’m Afraid I Don’t Care

I have been in a particularly irritable mood the past few days, and whilst I will blame this on hormones the truth is, if I am honest with you (and if you can’t be in honest in a blog what’s the point in writing one?) I’m often grumpy, even when I’m in a good mood.

At work this yesterday morning I got very pissed off with one of my colleagues, who’s clear disdain for me is making my work life miserable.  For months and months she has bitched about me, saying I am only getting the extra work etc because I am friends with the bosses. I am friends with the bosses. One of them is one of my new BFFs, but this came after I got more shifts than her. 

If I was in an ACME cartoon, my face would be red and steam would be coming out of my ears, every time she mentions “favourites”.  Heaven forbid I’m good at my job!   Yesterday I was so worked up by her I actually had a little cry. 

But to be perfectly honest, whilst she drives me insane, her opinion of me matters very little.  I am younger and prettier, better at my job and have my whole life ahead of me, whilst hers is unquestionably probably half over.

There should not be this stigma that we have to be friends with everyone we know, that we have to like them and get along.  The world would be a very boring place (albeit more peaceful) if we did.  Without conflict in relationships and in the workplace, what on earth would people have a good bitch about over a bottle of wine?

DAY/POST 5 of 365

Allergic To Your Know It All-Ness

It is a truth universally acknowledged that the minute you have a sniffle, look a bit tired or start sneezing and itching yourself into a frenzy that people will a) take a step back and b) start to offer you some useless piece of advice.

Now, I have been known to offer my medicinal advice from time to time, but when people do it to me it drives me INSANE. 

As a chronic allergy sufferer I frequently look puffy, red eyed, snotty etc during the day.  You offering your advice does not make me feel better. In fact it just draws my attention to the fact that I look like hell. Cheers for that!

For everyone’s future reference, I have had severe allergies since I was 12 years old. I am immune to practically every antihistamine commercially available. Rhinocort does not help and I can pop the super strength Claryitine like a Tic Tac. Not only this, but I have gone down the naturopathic herbal acupuncture route as well.. so please don’t tell me about your natural miracle cure! Nothing works. And it’s not some stupid fad reaction to Gluten or Dairy either.

With (according to the second allergy specialist I have visited) severe allergies to SEVEN types of pollens and grasses Australia wide (and don’t forget those dustmites) I have found only one cure for the never ending eye itchiness….

Moving to the UK.

So unless you can offer me a free plane ticket, please shut up.

DAY/POST 4 of 365

Once Again, (Some Of) My Facebook Friends Are Dumbasses

I have written about this before and unfortunately my friends on Facebook have continued to be dumbasses and I need to write this again.

For the love of all that is good and holy, stop becoming FANS of STUPID THINGS!! I don’t understand why people continue to do this! Join a fan page for something that is not even fan-worthy and therefore annoy Miss Ginger every time she looks at her live feed. 

The latest pointless fan pages that I have looked at in wonder are:

• Google It
• Karma
• Days Off (Because the majority of the population hates a day off!)
• Tattoos
• I Hate It When People Unexpectedly Go Offline (maybe cause they don’t want to talk to YOU!)
• Hate Waiting For A Reply Text
• Getting Paid (Everyone loves to work for free)
• Spinny Chairs (Really???)
• Pretending to Text In Awkward Situations (Who admits to this??)
• Waking Up With Unread Texts
• Saying “I Dunno” When I Can’t Be Bothered To Explain Something

These are NOT things that someone becomes a fan of!  You can be a fan of a TV Show, Celebrity, Musician, Movie, Writer.. or ACTUAL THINGS THAT HAVE FAN BASES. 

And let me point out to all of you.  Facebook know that we will all use their site regardless of how many people join groups for “Dislike Button”, “Change Facebook Back” etc etc. They don’t CARE at all!!

One last thing.. why does FB now suggest that I write on peoples walls?  “Reconnect with so-and-so” Um, no thanks. They are probably only my friend so I can be nosy without having to actually talk to them.

I don’t know why this makes me so angry, but it does. And now I have vented it out for another good six months. 

DAY/POST 3 of 365

Woohoo! Scarf Complete - PROOF

I’m so proud of it, I thought I’d share it with you!  Pete if you are reading don’t look…

Woohoo! Scarf Complete.

Dedicated readers will be aware that at the start of the year I took up knitting. My good friend Pete suggested I knit him a scarf which I though would be a great idea.

Six bloody months this scarf has taken me!  It has been a never ending mission to finish this in time for his birthday. I decided to make it wide so it was more “manly”.. big mistake!

FINALLY I have done it! I have finished it! It looks rubbish, is uneven, and the pattern doesn’t match due to me running out of black wool. But it is done and I am filled with an amazing sense of pride in having created something hand made for someone that I love (in an extremely platonic way). Well done me. 

So keep an eye on the post Pete… your long awaited scarf is on the way.  I apologise for its crapness in advance.

DAY/POST 2 of 365

Well Meaning Advice Falls Upon Deaf Ears

As you all know I have been single for quite some time now and because of this well meaning friends frequently offer advice.

One of my most beloved friends, Andre, has given me a list of things that I am not allowed to talk about when I am on a date or picking up boys.  These vary from my love of Harry Potter to “try not to be too ginger”. 

I have made the executive decision to disregard all this advice for two reasons.

1. I am an interesting, nice girl albeit with some eccentric tendencies.  I am not going to hide my true personality or try and be someone I am not.  I have done this before and it never works.

2. I am not interested in going out with someone who scares easily.  If they are put off by my love of children’s book series or the fact that I like to knit or that I love to communicate (and yes that means excessive text messages) then they are hardly going to be worthwhile catch in the long run.

So thank you my dear friends, but if you can love me for who I am, then there is a man out there who will too. 

PS. Please bear with me whilst I experiment with blog design and fonts etc. I was bored of the old layout and have been browsing all the amazing templates online.  Huge fan of www.suckmylolly.com!!

DAY/POST 1 of 365

365 Days – 365 Posts. The S.L.O.Ginger Project!

Today I went and saw ‘Julie & Julia’; a fabulous movie about a chef and a blogger. A friend recommended it to me and said she knew I would want to blog about it afterwards.  Well, she was correct.

Once again I have come across something that inspires the creative bones in my body.  It reminded me that I want to be a writer.  One day, before I leave this world, I want to walk into a bookstore and see upon a shelf a book with my name on it.  I don’t care if it’s not a bestseller, or if nobody reads it.  But I want to write it so bad.

This dream of mine is one that is fleeting.  I can’t seem to stick to it, or dedicate the time to it.  I get inspiration for blogs all the time whilst driving or in my mundane job but never get the patience to sit down with my laptop and do it.

Last Monday I turned 26. An age where I thought I would have accomplished so much more in my life.  25 was an extremely mediocre year for me and I am determined that 26 will be spectacular. So here is my project…

Every day from now until my 27th birthday I am going to post at my blog that has been neglected for so long.  I am going to build my readership and improve my writing.  And that is not all… I’m going to take control of my life and be open to new opportunities.

Stay tuned my (few) faithful followers, it’s going to be an entertaining year!

It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

Around this time every year something wonderful happens. Not only do I turn another year older (and get showered with praise and affection), but all the shops become a twinkling delight of festive fun.  Novelty gifts are on display and the smell of mince pies is in the air.  That’s right… it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas!
This is by far my most favourite time of year.  Each year the  lead up to Christmas fills me with a childlike delight that surprises me with its intensity every year. I love the carols, the songs, the food, the tinsel, the decorations, the present buying, gift wrapping, Santa, EVERYTHING! 
But to be honest, one thing I’m now a huge fan of is Christmas Day.  It’s very overrated.  A day when you are forced to spend time with your family with whom you either spend every day with anyway or don’t see for an entire year.  Christmas lunch is always a bit bland and it’s always STUPIDLY hot.  So hot that all you want to do is sit on the couch in your underwear watching re-runs of Friends or The Simpsons (but the Christmas episodes naturally). 
I’ll deal with Christmas Day when it gets here.. but in the meantime it’s the season to be jolly, I hear those sleigh bells ring-a-ling and I’m going to dust off my santa’s helper outfit and fill up my novelty reindeer wine glass with Christmas Cheer!  Ho Ho Ho!