Status Update?

Today, I’d like to pose a question to you all – when is the appropriate time in a relationship to change your Facebook Status?

Certainly you don’t want to jump in too early, nor do you want to be the first to do so. Likewise, I don’t want to delay the matter too long.

It’s a funny thing really, and a serious part of modern day relationship politics. I mean, I post that I am “in a relationship” and essentially I am screaming to the world that “Yippee! I have a boyfriend”. Then there is the huge risk that you change your status, and two weeks later “.. is no longer listed in a relationship” – your misfortune apparent for all to see.

I also have the dilemma of I can’t see what his relationship status is. After the conscious decision to not become friends on Facebook (after all, I don’t want to turn into crazy stalking girlfriend constantly questioning who that girl is in that photo) I am not privileged to this information.

So, to change, or not to change, that is the question!

New Discovery

I frequently find myself with a bit of an internal dilemma when writing at Secret Life. This is supposedly the one place where I can speak my mind, be brutally honest, vent and share. However, with so many of my close friends, the man, and occasionally my Dad reading this, I have found myself holding back on sharing things that I want to.

But today as I was strolling through Westfield London, I decided to no longer care. So without further ado I would like to tell you about something that has been on my mind recently. 

Oral Sex is a funny sort of thing to want to do really. The blow job I completely understand, It’s entirely an external thing, and as long as it’s been washed recently not entirely unpleasant. In fact, it’s incredibly satisfying to seeing and feeling your man orgasm, and feeling them explode inside your mouth makes you feel close to them in a way that few things do.

But I’ve nearly really enjoyed it when they return the favour. That is until I made the recent discovery that in fact, it is awesome. Perhaps all the men beforehand just had no idea what they were doing. The Ex used to point blank refuse to do it, and I think subconsciously that put me off. But now, I adore it. Perhaps because my man is incredibly skilled with his tongue and his fingers, or perhaps because I am comfortable enough to not be paranoid that they’re not enjoying it – but for whatever reason, I can’t get enough.

Boredom

Friday, and a whole weekend stretched ahead of me with not a huge amount going on.

Yes, boredom has struck with a vengeance. I know I shouldn’t complain, but I am going to for a minute. I’m bored out of my fucking mind.

When all your friends are at work, and you’ve applied for all the new jobs, there really isn’t a whole lot to do.

Well that’s a lie, there is LOTS to do, but not a huge amount to do that doesn’t cost money.  Boredom makes me hungry (but can’t eat as battling wine babies and Heathrow injections). Boredom also makes me incredibly horny, as as a great way to kill the time is to google ways to give better blow jobs and other interesting tips. In fact if unemployment continues, I am on the road to becoming a complete and utter sexual by the end of the month.

Oh well, the sun is out so off I shall go to wander the streets and inevitably end up in Primark, buying stockings to wear with my suspender belt this weekend. Ho hum..

Crash & Burn

It’s quite funny how your mood can crash in an instant. Like mine randomly did this morning.

Walking to the station with Mr W I was happy and content. After all, not only did I get cuddles, but he brought me back postcards from his recent trip to Italy. However as we got on the train to Waterloo, him heading to work and me heading to job hunt, I crashed like a child after a sugar-fuelled birthday party.

It was all I could do to not burst into tears. Which would have been embarrassing. It was bad enough that I had my “worried, thinking face” on. The fact is, which is just ridiculous, that going to work with someone made it all the more aware that I do not have a job.

Whilst I can support myself jobless for a couple more months, the longer it goes the harder it will be. And as my readers will well be aware, unemployment does not suit me. Constant rejections from recruitment agencies and potential employers does get to you after awhile.

I know that I am awesome, talented, experienced and hard-working – it’s just a bitch trying to get other’s to realise that as well.

Combine this sudden dejection with mild home-sickness (particularly for my puppy), some lady-parts hormonal issues and a bad nights sleep and you get near tears on the train. Which, thanks to my Wayfarers, I managed to hide from the man well.